What bokononists whisper whenever they think of how complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is.


By Elton Beard

There are two kinds of people in the world, those who divide people into two kinds and those who don't. I don't.


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ARCHIVE ARCHIVE ARCHIVE

Sunday, July 27, 2003
8:00 PM PT


 
 
Shorter George F. Will:
A Botched Constitution

  • The European Union fails to grasp that a proper constitution is parsimonious in allocating individual rights, as evident in the havoc caused by our own overly indulgent guarantees of equal protection and due process.

Friday, July 25, 2003
4:30 PM PT

Shorter Steven Den Beste:
We Won't Back Down

  • Bush had to lie to get his war on, but I can discern his true motive and it is good.


And what better time to note that D-Squared originated the concept with this Shorter Steven den Beste.

9:00 AM PT

Shorter Joint Congressional Inquiry:
9/11 Report

  • What we had there was a failure to communicate.

7:30 AM PT

Shorter Dick Cheney:
Remarks on War on Terror at AEI

  • We had no desire to invade Iraq until a recent intelligence report - the manipulation of which I had no hand in - indicated a looming threat to America that left us no choice but to go to war.

Thursday, July 24, 2003
11:30 AM PT

Shorter George F. Will:
A Questionable Kind Of Conservatism

  • The Bush administration is not nearly conservative enough for me.

Wednesday, July 23, 2003
7:00 AM PT

Shorter Mark R. Levin:
Lies about Iraqi Nukes

  • Bill Clinton used bogus nuclear arms allegations to justify an unprovoked attack on Iraq first!
Produced in consultation with Sadly, No.

Tuesday, July 22, 2003
2:00 PM PT

Shorter Ronald D. Asmus and Kenneth M. Pollack:
The Neoliberal Take on the Middle East

Neoconservatives want an empire, neoliberals merely want to remodel a quarter of the planet, and then there are the outmoded traditionalists who don't believe in starting wars based on grand, unproven theories.

10:30 AM PT

Shorter Richard Cohen:
Bush the Believer

  • George W. Bush is a simple-minded but honest man who put too much faith in duplicitous advisors.

Monday, July 21, 2003
5:00 PM PT

Epistemology suddenly popular.

July 18 Casper Weinberger

That we have not yet located huge deposits of weapons of mass destruction does not mean they do not or did not exist. After all, we have not yet found Saddam Hussein or his remains--but not even Democratic presidential candidates or the New York Times contend that he did not exist.
July 20 Clifford D. May
It's true that weapons of mass destruction have not yet been found. Nor have we found Saddam. Or Osama bin Laden. But Saddam and Osama exist.
July 21 William Safire
Drop the premature conclusion that if we can't yet find proof of the destructive weapons, they never existed. That's like saying because we haven't found Osama or Saddam, those killers never existed.
Update: This felonious assault against logic has also been noted by Different Strings, Mad Kane, Roger Ailes, Sadly, No and uber-diagrammer uggabugga.

1:00 PM PT

Shorter Bill Safire:
Saddam's Guerrillas

  • To question Bush's method or motive for launching an unprovoked war is to support a mass-murdering maniac.

Home


ARCHIVE

2007
December          
November          
October          
September          
August          
July  30      9  
June          
May          
April  2        
March  5        
February  5 12 19 26  
January  1  8 15 22 29
 
2005
December 5 12 19 26  
November   7 14 21 28
October 3 10 17 24 31
September 5 12 17 26  
August 1 8 15   29
July 5 12      
June   6 13 20 27
May       23 30
April 4 11 18 25  
March   7 14 21  
February   7   21 28
January 3   17 24 31
2006
December          
November          
October          
September   11 18 25  
August   7     28
July 3 10 17 24 31
June 5 12 19 26  
May   8 15 22 29
April 3 10 17 24  
March   6 13 20 27
February   6 13 20 27
January 2 9 16 23 30
2003
December 1 8 15    
November 3 10 17 24  
October 6 13 20 27  
September 1 8 15 22 29
August 4 11 18 25  
July 7 14 21 28  
June 2 9 16 23 30
May 5 12 19 26  
April 7 14 21 28  
March 3 17   31  
February 3 17   24  
January 6 13 20 27  
2004
December   6 13 20  
November 1 8 15 22 29
October 4 11 18 25  
September H 6 13 20 27
August I A T U S
July          
June   7 14 21 28
May 3 10 17 24 31
April   5 12 19 26
March 1 8 15 22 29
February 2 9 16 23  
January   12 19 26  
2001
December 3   10    
November 4   11 19 26
October   11      
September          
August          
July          
June          
May          
April          
March          
February          
January                      
2002
December 2 9 16 23 30
November 4 11 18 25  
October 7 14 21 28  
September   9 16 23  
August 5 12 19    
July 1 8 15 22 29
June 3 10   24  
May 6 13 20    
April 1     22  
March 4 11 18 25  
February 4   18 25  
January 6   21 28  


Busy, busy, busy.

What bokononists whisper whenever they think of how complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is.


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